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1-603-994-SAFE (7233)
Free and Confidential Support
20 International Drive, Suite 300 Portsmouth, NH 03801
Business Line: 1-603-436-4107
In-person advocacy is by appointment only.
Click "Chat Now" to talk with a confidential advocate Monday- Friday│9 am- 4 pm
I am a two-time sexual assault survivor. The first incident occurred in my childhood, and a relative was responsible. When it’s a relative it’s a double whammy, you have an attachment and love and loyalty at some level, and the telling becomes complicated. The years afterwards were fairly chaotic, with over-indulgences that were not healthy for my mind, body or spirit. Later, as an adult, I confronted my abuser and was able to state my feelings through a letter. That decision was important and helpful, as I received both an admission of the acts done and an apology.
As soon as I chose the truth I knew I would survive.
Fast forward to my mid-forties. I was subjected to drug facilitated sexual assault, which was then aired on the Internet. As pieces of my memory surfaced, I was the focus of public attempts to scare, shame, and blame me for the assault. What I do know is that it happened.
When I finally connected to sexual assault support groups in the area I discovered we all have a right to report crimes even if we’re lacking key information. Knowing it happened is enough. It took me three tries, eventually showing up with an advocate by my side, to achieve that goal. I needed an investigation, more information. I was told by the state victims rights advocate that not only was I lacking proof, the statute of limitations had run out. She let me know she was sorry. The painful, lonely, traumatic mess has been doable because of both the human support I’ve been blessed to receive, and the spiritual guidance and love I claim through my faith.
My message to other survivors is “Don’t cave. Don’t get isolated, stay connected. It’s just so important".
Keep remembering “This is your life, you have the right to be here, to pursue your dreams". I know I’ll be all right, and that by sharing what I’ve been through with others I’ve gained strength.
HAVEN serves women, men, children, and all people of marginalized genders and identities affected by domestic and sexual violence. HAVEN is the largest violence prevention and support services agency in NH. The need to eliminate domestic and sexual violence, while supporting individuals and families, is greater than ever. Your support will help us better serve Rockingham and Strafford Counties, ultimately making the Greater Seacoast a safer place to live.
At HAVEN, our goal is to prevent violence from happening in the first place, in addition to supporting kids and families who have experienced trauma.
Going classroom to classroom, our Educators use age-appropriate, interactive curricula to engage students K-12 in conversations about personal body safety, boundaries, consent, and how to seek help from a trusted adult. HAVEN’s Prevention Education program strives to make our community a safer place by changing mindsets and empowering the next generation.
Invite HAVEN to talk to your group, business, faith community, class or club. HAVEN also attends health and wellness fairs, community wide events, and volunteer events. For more information please call the main office 603-436-4107.
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HAVEN serves Rockingham and Strafford counties, located on the traditional ancestral homeland of Pentucket, Pennacook, Abenaki and Wabanaki Peoples of past and present who were displaced through the 1713 Treaty of Portsmouth. We acknowledge and honor with gratitude the aki (land), nibi (water), and alnobak (people) who have stewarded the N’dakinna (homeland) throughout the generations and continue to be oppressed. While these tribes are not federally recognized, we believe in their right to sovereignty.
HAVEN does not and shall not discriminate based on race, color, religion (creed), gender, gender identity or expression, age, national origin (ancestry), physical, mental or emotional ability or disability, marital status, sexual orientation, health status (including pregnancy), literacy, language, immigration status, socio-economic status, political affiliation, or military status.
We are committed to providing an inclusive and welcoming environment for all.
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